Which Bible translation do you use?

Recently, as a project for my Greek class, I have been translating the book of Colossians. To say the least this is a tedious and arduous process that requires more patience than I generally keep in stock. But nonetheless, I shall persist. After struggling through many theologically dense and grammatically...well...long, Pauline sentences I began to get the joke that all Greek professors must be playing on their students: I'm never going to be a Bible translator.

You may have stumbled across at some point one of those silly little articles called "If kids wrote the Bible," or "If college students wrote the Bible," or some other sorts of Bible jokes. These are usually good for a chuckle and typically lighten my day. But here's a new question, What if Greek students wrote the Bible?

While trudging through Colossians I have translated a number of verses that don't exactly match the NRSV...or KJV...or any other translation for that matter. Feel free to check my translation against your own Bible, you might just have a laugh.

What follows are a few verses that I for some reason just didn't get.

"In order that in him might be good pleasure all the fullness to dwell." Col. 1:19

"And you at one time were being alienated and an enemy of the mind in the works in wickedness, but now he reconciled in the body of his flesh through the death to stand beside you holy and faultless and blameless in his sight, but if you might continue in the faith being grounded and steadfast and not being moved from the hope of the gospel which you heard the one having been preached in all creation the one under heaven which was made I Paul a servant." Col. 1:21-23

"For if and in the flesh I'm absent but in spirit I'm together with you rejoicing and seeing you the dignity and the steadfastness of in Christ your faith." Col. 2:5

To quote the words of Paul of Tarsus:

"Εἰ οὖν συνηγέρθητε τῷ Χριστῷ, τὰ ἄνω ζητεῖτε, οὗ ὁ Χριστός ἐστιν ἐν δεξιᾷ τοῦ Θεοῦ καθήμενος."

Yep, I don't know what he's saying either.

Needless to say, even though studying Greek has been fun, I think I'll just stick to my NIV for now.